Execution of this film was derailed
by Nathan Orians
Nov 22, 2010 | 2012 views | 0 0 comments | 40 40 recommendations | email to a friend | print
In the new movie “Unstoppable” there is a dark cloud threatening small towns in Pennsylvania, and it’s none of the usual suspects. Terrorists haven’t kidnapped the senator’s son. Aliens aren’t raining fiery death from above. There isn’t a comet plunging towards the earth. No natural disasters or super villains either…just a runaway train.

This train carries explosive material and speeds through residential neighborhoods, and if it crashes, it has a blast radius of up to a mile. Nothing can stop the train because it will literally “vaporize anything in front of it.” But that’s not even the biggest problem; they have no idea where the train is. (Of course, it might be on the track and that would be a good place to start looking.)

Denzel Washington stars alongside Chris Pine in this thriller. For Washington, this movie sort of makes up for his previous movie “Training Day.” This film is the real “Training Day.” On the streets, life is predictable, but on the tracks you never know what’s going to happen. Trains are vicious.

I went into the theater wondering how they possibly made this into a full-length feature film, but it seems they did it with almost no acting and no script to speak of; they just kept the camera and train rolling. With a few explosions and a ton of close-ups of Pine’s and Washington’s scarily white teeth, the movie stretched itself into a cinematic flop that lasted 1 hour and 38 minutes.

On a side note, I wanted to use a pun about the movie being a train wreck so many times that I think I should win a Pulitzer for my self-restraint. If anybody wants to nominate me I won’t object.

Don’t go see this movie. Not only is it awful, but it gives public transportation a bad name. With gas prices as high as they are these days, riding a train shouldn’t seem scary.

(Rating: 2/5)
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