Have you heard of these people called “Republicans”?
Sep 28, 2010 | 14603 views | 0 0 comments | 63 63 recommendations | email to a friend | print

We here at Pol Position don't claim be experts on running a political campaign. Heck, we don't claim to be experts at anything except mixing up the perfect Night Train Express Wine Cooler-tini. (Don't even ask, it's a Pol Position secret!)

But we do know that if you are a lesser-known candidate trying to get your name and message out to the voters, it's probably not a good idea to spend the first four paragraphs of your introductory letter to the neighborhood papers ranting about the ignorance and unprofessionalism of the local press.

But that's exactly what happened earlier this week when we received a big packet of information from candidate Humberto Suarezmotta, a Republican challenging Francisco Moya, the Democratic nominee in the 39th Assembly District in Queens.

Apparently, another local Queens paper reported that, following Moya's victory in the primary, a field which included Hiram Monserrate, a former State Senator who was booted from office after pleading guilty to assaulting his girlfriend, that Moya had no Republican challenger. Now, we don't want to say which Queens paper made the error (oh all right! It was the Queens Courier!), but that was a factual error in reporting, as Suarezmotta let us know in his rather condescending letter.

Actually, the letter isn't signed and it refers to Suarezmotta in the third person, but the author does discuss his motives behind sending out the candidate's biography, as well as lengthy breakdown of where he stands on the issues.

“Out of concern that such ignorance might not be limited to the publishers and staff of the Courier, Friends of Suarezmotta decided to issue this press release,” read the letter.

Here's the first tow paragraphs:

“By decades of experience, we Republicans in Queens County have come to understand, if not accept, the reality that the local newspapers will give no ink to our candidates with the one exception being that they will occasionally criticize our presidential nominees.

One might have hoped that our local journalists would have noticed that last year the Republican candidates won three Queens seats in the City Council previously held by Democrats, and that their journalistic instincts would have caused them to wonder what might be happening this year. Sadly, that is not the case.”

Stop the monkey-lovin' presses! Did we just read that right? Three Republicans from Queens were elected to the City Council last year! Man, we are really out of the loop. Guess we can no longer avoid starting a Friendster account so we can keep up with what's going on. And what the hell are “journalistic instincts.” Sounds made-up to us.

Actually, not to be nit-pickers, but there were only two Republicans elected to seats formerly held by Democrats last year, and that was Dan Halloran and Peter Koo. In fact, Eric Ulrich was running as an incumbent, so therefore that seat was already held by a Republican. Just sayin'.

As for not giving any “ink” to Republican candidates, a quick phone call to either Halloran, Koo, or Ulrich would have revealed that our editorial board met with all three of the candidates during their campaigns. (Or you could have just read our papers. Either way.) From what we heard they were very memorable meetings, too. They discussed the issues, played some Pictionary, and then everybody went for ice cream. We'll try to get photos and post them to our new Friendster account.

In fact, not only did our paper meet with all three of them, we actually endorsed them over their Democratic challengers!

So as you can see Friends of Suarezmotta, the ignorance is indeed limited to the publishers and staff of the Queens Courier. Just kidding, there's ignorance all around, it's a dirty little trade secret, but our door is always open to dark horse candidates with absolutely no shot. Just kidding again! Seriously Mr. Suarezmotta, call our office and we'll set up a time to talk about your campaign, or if your more comfortable with the latest technologies, just hit us up on Friendster.

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